Sunday 11 November 2012

Random Thoughts


Ok it's 10.40pm and I feel like doing a blog post as there is so much going round my head! 
I can't seem to get over how awesome God is! He is incredible! I love listening to worship songs because they are so meaningful and powerful to me, it's how I connect with God I guess.

Although I have been through a rather sucky year, I need to remember that GOD NEVER LEFT ME... I struggled with that for a while, and still do to be quite honest but I need to keep reminding myself of the truth.

I've had a few days in the past week where I've felt like I was being attacked, I had bad days where everything seemed to go wrong and I've felt really depressed and upset, putting myself down all the time. I just don't feel adequate sometimes. 

But the song above - Jesus Paid It All is one of my favourites! Just because of the emotional connection I get with it! I don't know why it's just a very meaningful song to me! It's very uplifting, and powerful!

"JESUS PAID IT ALL" - It just sums it all up really!!

Right, that's got a few things of my mind!

God Bless
Sarah xx

Thursday 8 November 2012

Something I read that made me cry... not for the faint hearted!


Ok, I've read this a few times but today I read it on another blog that I'm following (an awesome blog!) and it really hit me... I mean after the Amanda Todd story, people have been talking about suicide more as it brought it to our attention. It's awful even to think about that someone would feel the need to end their lives.
This is for all you guys reading this who feel so depressed that you feel the need to punish yourself...
Remember one thing, 
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.'" (Jeremiah 29:11-13, NIV)
GOD CARES.... 
I'll let you read this now...

"Want to kill yourself? Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You've had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you've written and rewritten over and over and over. You take out your razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you lying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell your dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, who is crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him. He realises what’s going on and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex-boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you...he can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, and wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad…bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry; she can’t feel anything. She’s numb. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they startlowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. It’s two years later. The whole school talks to a counsellor/therapist at least once a week. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex-boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self-harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lies in bed all day. People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just affect you. They affect everyone. Don’t end your life; you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are."

God Bless
Sarah 
xx

Thursday 1 November 2012

What does the future hold?



Hiya, so on Sunday evening I came home from church and after having tea got involved in a very deep conversation about Heaven and Hell. It was quite heavy but brilliant to get questions out into the open that had been on my mind for a while.
One thing that became clearer was this verse: 
"Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea." Revelation 21:1
I've always thought of Heaven being out of our time but no one knows where it is. However one thing that really made me think was talking about restricting Heaven, by giving it a limit. We assume that heaven is above us - in the sky but that means that it has a level where it stops and that is limiting God. Why do we do that? 
The idea of Judgement Day has also always confused me as I've never really been told much about it. I wasn't sure if I was meant to believe in it. I thought that I either believed in souls going straight to Heaven and being with God or that the dead remain in the ground until Judgement Day when God will Judge the dead and send them to either Heaven and Hell.
However I have now learnt and am beginning to understand the idea of God creating a new Heaven and new  Earth. I still believe that when someone dies and if they have given their life to Jesus then their soul will go to Heaven to live with God UNTIL the final judgement day. There will be a time when Jesus returns and will raise the dead and judge both the dead and the living. The current Heaven will be brought down to the current Earth and all will be judged. Then the first heaven and first earth will pass away. 
With regards to where Heaven is I believe that it is completely outside of time as God is eternal and too outside of time so it is irrelevant. 
However despite not being able to understand everything, one thing I do believe is that there is place in Heaven with MY name on it, and your name too if you have given your life to Jesus. Now I'm not saying that I am a "perfect Christian" and therefore I have a place in Heaven because I am most certainly not! But it is God's grace that has given me a place. I don't deserve it, none of us do. We are sinners. But Jesus died so that these sins can be forgiven. He did all the hard work for us! "IT IS FINISHED" That truly means that the debt has been paid, it's done and Jesus is waiting for me in Heaven.
So even though death is a scary thing to think about, let your hope of Heaven overcome this fear as there is nothing to be scared about when you are going to be with your Saviour.
Remember:
"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Revelation 21:4
There are still things that I am unsure about and I guess I will not know until I get there but please if there is anything I missed or that you believe please comment below or email me :)  I would love to hear other people's views!!
God Bless
Sarah 
xx